loss…

i’ve been trying to write a blog post for a while now, but i keep deleting everything i write…

on february 15, 2013, we lost my awesome father-in-law.  quickly.  within one month we found out he had liver cancer, and then – he was gone.

i wanted to write a post in honor of him, but it’s too soon.  i’m not ready.

and as i was trying to write, the mail came.  the latest issue of Sunset magazine, which we did not subscribe to.  i read the address label and it read “Mr-Mrs L-S Aguilar”.

Mr-Mrs L-S Aguilar.  only my father-in-law wrote our names like that.  (i kept my last name when i married lawrence.)  i guess he ordered us a gift subscription to Sunset magazine as recently as december or january.

the tears came.  and continue to come.  i’m not ready yet to write about my beautiful, funny, handsome suegro (suegro = father-in-law in spanish; “suegro” is what i called him).  just let me share a photo of him in happy times (at my mother’s 76th birthday party, 2010)…

suegroWM

he is greatly missed…♥

i tried to create new work, if only to help with the sadness and anger i feel, but i couldn’t.  i had put my Etsy shops on vacation but they’re up and running again as of yesterday.  slowly…slowly…i’m getting back to business.  i forget, for a while.

and then a gift from my father-in-law arrives in the mail…

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4 thoughts on “loss…

  1. Susie, I’m sorry for your loss, I too lost my Suegro a few years ago. As time passes so does the pain. Just knowing they are no longer in pain is a relief. Respectfully, Imxula

    • thank you so much for your comment, linda, and i’m sorry for your loss. around here, it still feels unreal and painful; his death has left such a void in our lives. and you’re right, although i miss him terribly, i remind myself that he is no longer suffering. thank you…♥

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